I wasn’t going to work today. So, I decided to clean my apartment, run some errands and do some cooking for the week. As usual, I rushed to the market, got some groceries then came back and put our laundry in the washing machine.
I left the machine running and went to the bedroom to organize my closet before cleaning. As I was doing this and that, something dropped off her bag. As usual, it wasn’t any of my business until it was. In my place, there are things you can’t find.
Pregnancy kits, contraceptives, or condoms. A pregnancy kit falls from her bag. That’s weird. I tell myself. Maybe it is somebody else's. I tell myself. I continue doing my stuff but this time another kit falls from her jacket. My curiosity gets the best of me.
Now, I wish I had not looked at it. Anyway, I didn’t know how to read the kits so I grabbed my laptop and googled how to read a pregnancy kit. I was feeling guilty for invading her privacy but I did it anyway. She was pregnant.
I mixture of confusion and disbelief took control of me. I don’t know which confused me more: the fact that she was pregnant or the fact that I’m female and my female friend was pregnant. I start laughing hysterically.
I pick my laptop again and quickly started to google. How to get pregnant? How do you know you are pregnant? What are the signs of pregnancy? Can a human being get pregnant by osmosis? Do you know all the things that you google when you are dumb?
All the information I got led to an existence of a sperm. What a minute, my CPU is overloaded. I quickly change into my trainers and decided to jog. This would have probably helped me clear my head if not my vision. I did not want to imagine what might have happened.
As I left the house, I left the kits on the table so that when she gets up she can see them. I started joining the dots of the things that were happening and that I was overlooking. Lemme tell you how I got into this mess with Olivia.
I had had a long day. All I wanted that day was to get home. Strip, take a long shower, eat and sleep. Nothing more nothing less. For some reason, there was a lot of traffic that day. Slow day. I got to the bus stop. I had to wait for a commuter to get home.
As I stood there staring aimlessly as people tried to scavenge for the buses, my thoughts revisited my day’s events. How I struggled to debug my code the whole day yet the missing bit was just a typo in a variable name. The trail of my thought was suddenly interrupted by a feeble touch on my shoulder. I turned. “Excuse me, can I use your phone?” a tiny female voice asked. First, I was taken aback. In the city, it is really hard to trust anyone. I hesitated. “I just want to call my mum”, she insisted.
My empathy has a way of obscuring my thinking. I was like, “what’s the worst that can happen”. I gave her my phone to make that call after all it can be me in her shoes. She moved three steps away and dialed her mum’s contact. Now, I’m not sure if it was.
She returned the phone crying claiming that the phone did not go through. I asked her, where her phone was and she said that it had gone off. Well, I had a power bank so gave it to her to charge but it was useless since we did not share a charger.
“Sorry, what did you say your name was again?” I asked. “I didn’t”, she responded. “What’s your name?” I asked laughing. “ Olivia but you can call me Liv”, she answered. “What will you do now that you don’t have a contact of where you are going?”
“I don’t know”, she said frowning. The thought of letting her sleep outside scared me. “ Well, you can sleep in my place tonight then you can go home tomorrow”, I told her. I did not mind hosting her for the night because could afford it anyway.
The lady was so happy. She hugged me but I did not hug her back. We boarded the next matatu to my humble abode. When we got home, I quickly took a shower and then made dinner for two. It was getting late. I was tired. I wanted to hear her story but if I did I would get late for work the next day. Having guests can be very restrictive. I could not sleep naked as usual. I told her, I was working half day the next day and if she decided to leave in the morning, she should leave my key under the mat.
When noon hit, I rushed out of the office. All I wanted was to get home because I was afraid I had left a stranger in my house. I took a cab and in fifteen minutes I was home. I had left her some cash for breakfast and bus fare.
The previous night, I had let her have my bed and I took the couch. When I go home, the “queen” was still sleeping. I put the veggies I had purchased into the fridge, showered, and did the dishes. Now, I was ready to listen. I sat on the carpet and switched on the tv.
“Hey, Liv. What happened yesterday?” I asked. “Mum mum kicked me out after piercing my nose. I wanted to go and stay with my brother but his phone is off”, she said softly. “What will you do now?” I queried. “I don’t know. Can I stay here for a few days?”
I knew I was going to sleep on the couch for just a few days. I was curious about her knitting skills so I got her wool and knitting sticks. I did not enjoy watching her idling at my place.
My off day was ending on Tuesday. On Monday, she made me a very beautiful sweater and a hoodie. That was dope given that I’m not artistic. In the afternoon, I asked if she had any news. She said no. I felt bad letting her get stranded so I gave her the conditions of staying.
First, you have to learn to make your own money so that you can pay your school fees. The only way to do that is to knit and sell your stuff. I will give you the capital you need to start your hustle. I told her. I got her more wool and clients to sell her stuff.
The next day When I got home, Liv had made a sweater for one of my friends. She had also made dinner for two. I told her never to cook for us again because she was a terrible cook. She was lazy but I kept pushing her. It was the only way to pay her school fees.
This fateful evening, two weeks from the day we met, she asked why I slept on the couch. I told her it was because she was my guest. She said that my bed was a 6x6 which means we can both sleep there. Honestly, I was tired of sleeping on the couch and with clothes on.
I asked her if she was ok if I slept naked. She said it was my place and I can do what I wanted. We had a back and forth about the fact that she is a guest and I am supposed to be a good host. Eventually, It was settled that I can sleep naked without offending her.
I changed the sheets, undressed, and dived in. I had never slept naked next to anyone. That was pretty weird. I had to put a pillow between us just to be safe. The next day I had an early morning flight and I was leaving for three weeks. Thank God.
The trip ended and I was back home. I kinda assumed she was my friend so I brought her a few gifts from where I was. She was excited to see me. She hugged me and kissed me on the cheek. The naive me thought that’s what female friends do to their friends.
Anyway, it did not bother me after all who doesn’t like being appreciated? Remember I was paying the rent, utilities, and buying food. I asked how her hustle was doing and she excitedly told me she had sold 10 pieces and saved like $150. I was happy for her.
I noticed she had also upgraded her closet and she could now wear the small shorts that show a lot of skin. She had that type of body that most men want for their women. Full boobs a fine ass and a flat tummy. Yeah. All I wanted was for her to figure her shit out.
When Liv met me I was just another village girl who was focusing on her career. I wasn’t looking for a guy to fall in love with. No, I was looking for more projects to work on. And that is exactly what I did. Work, work out, eat and sleep.
A month after, since Liv moved in with me, I had another trip and this time I was going away for a month. I hardly wear dresses but on this fateful day, I decided to put on a body con. I asked Liv to help me zip up. She looked at my tiny body and started laughing.
Damn, you are so tiny. Your waist can fit in my hands. Your boobs are smaller than that golf ball. She said laughing even harder. Your butt cheeks are big but still smaller than most people. I tried to argue but she was laughing too much.
“Ok, that’s enough. Please zip me up”, I said. “Wait, I got you something”, she said laughing. it was a tiny bikini top. “Let me show you how it’s worn”. She adjusts the little thing. She then puts her hand on my boobs. I told you they can fit in my hands. Laughing
I froze. I did not understand why she had done that. I look at her blankly and told her that I liked the bikini and she can now zip me up. I left my house confused. When I was away that was when it hit me. She liked ladies. I have always looked at her like a sister.
After three weeks I was back again and as usual, I got her something that she couldn’t afford or get in Kenya. It made her happy. I was also happy that she was saving up for her education. When I got back the hugs were tighter and longer. Most probably I needed them.
I did my normal routine. Did a quick catch-up on the internet, cooked then changed my sheets, and dived into the bed naked. 27th November, She must have gotten so comfortable that she also decided to sleep naked. I freaked out. I was too scared to turn.
I remember sleeping in the farthest end. Straighter than a ruler. I was tired and all I needed was sleep. After worrying for half the night, I finally fell asleep. When I woke up the next morning at around 9 am, she had made me breakfast. My favorite.
I ate my meal silently as my brain argued between asking when she is leaving and whether she liked girls. After a long debate, I decided to go for a swim. “By the time I’m back, I will have the guts to ask her”, I told myself. I showered and got out of the house.
When I came back, Liv was in shorts and you could see her butt cheeks peeping. I acted like I had not seen it and went straight to the kitchen. I did my normal chores and then sat on the couch watching soccer. I remember how Manchester united was thrashed.
I did the normal then stripped and got to bed. At 11 pm, Liv tapped me and I turned. “You have a good heart”, she said. “ Thank you”, I responded. “And very pretty too”, she continued. “I am?” I asked. I was surprised. “Ooook, thanks”. I turned and slept.
The next day, I was woken up at 5 am by a slow touch on my back. I could feel goosebumps all over my body. My brain stopped as my body did the talking. Quagmire as my brain and body conflicted. Do all women have recessive lesbianism genes? What are you doing?
I could feel all my glands dripping as I tripped. I just out of the bed wore my tracksuit and ran out of the house. I remember running for ten kilometers and then walking back. When I got home she was smiling like a hero. “What’s up with you?” I asked, this time angry.
“You should have seen how flushed your face was in the morning. You liked it”, she said. “No, I like guys not women”, I told her. “Maybe”, she said. I did not want the night to come because I did not trust her around me. That evening I got a call and I had to travel.
That night I remember praying that she sleeps so heavily and forget that I was there. I had really bad headaches that day and I asked her if she could massage my back. I remember lying down and the next thing I’m waking up with her hands around my waist. I didn't want to panic.
I slowly lift her arm and get off. I decided to look at her and that was when I saw her body. A light lady with all feminine features. I quickly cache that view. Hit the shower then got to the airport. The last thing I needed was confusion and distractions.
4th January, this time I did not bring her anything from my trip. I did not want to be misunderstood. When I got home, she was scantly dressed as usual. She was really happy to see me but frowned that I didn’t get her anything. I made dinner for us and we ate.
I was tired that day and I asked her to apply some menthol on my back but she offered to give me a full body massage. I accepted assuming that she had forgotten about the last encounter. I laid straight on the bed. That was a painful massage but it touched every bit.
On Wednesday, I was still tired so I stayed indoors as Live went to deliver her stuff to her clients. I had a bad migraine that day so I did not do much. When she came back, she said, “hey beautiful, I got you ice cream”. She was excited. I was pissed she was spending her fees.
She offered to put an ice bag on my forehead. I needed it so I accepted. “You have kissable lips”, she said calmly. “mmmh”, I responded. The next thing I’m waking up in her arms naked. She wasn’t sleeping. She was just looking at me. “What are you afraid of?” she asked.
I did not know what I was afraid of. I was even afraid of looking at her large boobs that hang above my head. I did not want to look at her. period. She bends slightly and kisses my forehead. “Don’t be scared”, she said. I can’t do anything dangerous. I did not like her tone.
She kisses my cheeks and my nose. I did not push her away. she continues to the area near my lips. I just stare into oblivion. She traces my arms with her finger the slight brushes my nipple. She kisses my neck and I quickly pull my duvet to conceal the goosebumps.
For some reason, I did not pull away. I had not experienced human touch before and curiosity got the best of me. Have you ever been in a zone where your body is responsive but your brain is not? With every touch, my brain failed. No words.
She toyed with my lips and finally a nuclear fusion. She kissed me. She did. On my lips. Every spring opened. I pulled away and faced her. “What do you want? You know I have never done this before? What happened to your brother?”
“stop talking”, she whispered. She slightly touched my erect nipples with the back of her hand. Then put them between her fingers. And play with them like babies. A drift to my tummy and navel. I could feel my breathing rate rising and fluids dripping.
From where I lay, she had access to every curve and crevice. She could see the response of my skin and could feel my heartbeat. I could not see much because I had closed my eyes as I experimented with human contact. I want to face my fears. The fear of feeling. The fear of losing control and getting lost in the moment. The fear of letting anybody in. The fear of liking a woman. The fear of the societal construct of who we should love or not. The fear of my African culture. The fear of everything around me that was about to change.
She placed my head on the pillow and slowly knelt above me. My tiny body was sandwiched between her legs. Her nipples touched my chest as she kissed my neck slowly and delicately. I could feel the air leaving my lips as I struggled to remain in control. As she squeezed my tiny boobs, I could feel my legs opening and my lower lips becoming succulent. Do I say juicy?
She traced my abs with her tongue and bit them making me moan for more. She kissed every inch. the slowly lifted my legs to form a ninety degrees angle. I will never forget what happened next. My body trembled with every bit, every touch. When she was done, I was immobile and like a statue. I just remember saying I am sorry. I flipped her back and sucked her tits as if my life depended on it. I played with her moist lower lips let to the river of life flow. For a moment I did not care. The rhythm of our bodies as every muscle contracted orgasmically was uncontrolled. The wetness of every opening created dominance we begged for more.
Liv asked me to be her girlfriend and I did not mind because “nobody ever made me feel this way”. However, I still wanted to know her progress with the brother. She said she found him and I was introduced the next Sunday. My work trips continued to happen and this time they became more frequent.
In April, I can back home as usual and this time I found Liv seated on my bed. Liv was scantly dressed and his brother was in a vest. I did not ask any questions but she said he was about to leave. I left the house to get groceries as I waited for the brother to leave. I did not suspect anything but I could feel a male scent in my place. I changed the sheets and cleaned the place up.
Liv continued to like me and treat me like a princess. She could drive my soul out of my body and back. From June, Liv started to visit his brother more. Especially on weekends. I didn’t mind that because they are siblings anyway. Some weird tension started to exist between us when I brought the story of school up. She would use make-outs to distract me.
She lost her focus on knitting and started focusing more on her brother. We fought a lot because of this. In August, Liv went to stay with his brother for a week. When she came back, she had gotten more egocentric and hard-headed. I did not understand. She was high and drunk. She was stinking and dirty. I cared about her. I took her to the shower and cleaned her like a little girl. As I did, I could see marks all over her body as if somebody had beaten her. The marks on her butt were larger than my stretch marks. I was worried.
All this time I knew that she was saving the cash she was making from knitting. What I did not know is that she stopped selling them and spent the money on her brother. I did not want her to give up. I thought I could save her. She changed me. That is not important. In September, I traveled again leaving her at home with clear instructions on dos and don’ts.
When I came back in October, Liv was hosting a party at my place and there were a lot of drunk people at my place. I was not happy. I waited for her guests to leave and then confronted her. She knew I hate guests and most importantly I hate the smell of alcohol. Forgive and forget, I told myself.
That’s how I met Liv. Today, when I bumped into pregnancy kits, I was shocked because she introduced me to loving women. I did not know if she was into dudes. She told me it was a time thing with Brian who was supposed to be her brother. I started connecting the dots about the days I met them in my house and the day she went away for a week.
Liv is carrying Brian’s child and she might not go to school after all. I will send her to her “brother” so that she can figure out her life. I woke up sweating and shaking.
